Ok, life got rather serious for a while, but I think I’m back. So let’s go at it with everything we have shall we? Which means I need to be writing a lot more, so let’s start writing this blog again, after all, some people did find it slightly amusing.

A quick recap since the last proper blog, which fizzled out in July last year (with some minor burst of flatulent blogs since). What’s happened?

· Did my first ever solo show at the Edinburgh Fringe 2009 – Hi, my name’s Chris Henry

· Got a 5star review

· Picked up a stalker at the Fringe

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I’ve been campaigning for votes to get myself the last place in the Scottish Sun’s, Take the Mic, competition. Getting the place gives me a chance of winning £12,000 and getting some much needed publicity, so i’ve taken it quite seriously. The thing is, it’s totally screwing with my head.

My natural instinc is to get as many votes as possible, getting myself in an Alpha state of mind, grrr, winner, must get prize, type thing. I’ve been constantly checking not just my votes on facebook and twitter, but checking my competitors too. Spying on their advertising, seeing which of our mutual friends have voted for them and not me (of which I remain silently indignant) all of which feels like a primitive drive and need to win.

On the other side of that, it’s now between me and 4 other comedians that are not just good at what they do, but they are all nice guys. All of them have a drive and passion to entertain audiences and do so succesfully every week. I’ve enjoyed a beer and a blether with them on frequent occasions. 2 of them have been partying with me till stupid o’clock in the morning on a number of drunken adventures.

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Hello there,

The Scottish Sun are running a competition for comedians, where the overall winner could win £12,000 and loads of good press. So being the needy narcissist that wants to be the centre of attention, I’m gagging to win this!

I was pipped to the post at the heats in Glasgow, but there is one place in the final left, which relies on an online vote. This is where I need your help.

There are three ways to vote (doing all three will help me even more, this is where it gets complicated)

First is on twitter, (If you don’t have a twitter account, set one up) if you have an account copy and paste this in to your next tweet -

I’m voting for Chris Henry at @takethemic http://bit.ly/cOqPvm

The second and third way of voting are done on the take the mic website. So click on the link below, then go to the bottom of the page where it says VOTE.

Under the facebook logo, Click the “like” button (it should change colour, then change back)

Then click the “Take The Mic” logo, once you’ve done that, it should then thank you for your vote.

http://www.takethemic.net/comedians/29-chris-henry

If you have already voted, thank you for your support, would be amazing if you could spread the word and get your friends to vote too. Voting closes on Friday at 3pm.

Thanks again from your needy, dirty joke teller,

Chris

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OK people, it’s official I will be in London in October, so I expect to be catching up with a mountain of you when I get down there, will be performing Batersea Highlight on the 22nd and 23rd! Will have more London dates soon, so will keep you posted.

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Why the hell has it taken me till the end of April to write anything on here, what the hell have I been doing? Let’s see, been doing lots of gigs, sold out a show at the Glasgow comedy festival in March, taken up resident compere at a new act night in Glasgow, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Comedy-The-Halt-Bar/339065469736?ref=ts did my first painting since i was in high school, maintained my single status and had lots of drunken adventures. So all in all, not much, this has to change!

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The local newspaper I used to deliver when I grew up did an article on, click on the link have a gander!

http://www.acadvertiser.co.uk/lanarkshire-news/local-news/monklands-news/2010/01/27/chris-henry-plays-it-for-laughs-at-glasgow-comedy-festival-65864-25688920/

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Hi, my name’s Chris Henry.
Performed by: Chris Henry (and Special Guest)
Venue: Capitol, 468 Sauchiehall Street, Glasgow.
Date: Saturday, 20th March 2010
Show starts: 8pm.
Tickets: £6

The cheeky comedian from Coatbridge brings his show “Hi, my name’s Chris Henry” to Glasgow on the 20th of March 2010. The loveable misogynist will be treating you to his thoughts on  life that won him a place in the final of the Scottish Comedian of the year 2009 competition and a five star review at the Edinburgh Fringe.
 
Don’t be fooled by his blue eyes and dimples, underneath that cheeky exterior lurks a sharp and often shocking mind that is primed to entertain you with complete disregard for all that is PC. He will have you laughing at his dysfunctional family, pointless trips to the gym, views on religion, intimate and indecent memories of past “relationships” and much much more.

So if you want to experience the festival at grass roots level, book your tickets using this link: 
 
CLICK HERE

All the big, fancy folk from TV have sold out their shows – “Chris is the next best thing!” (Karen McKim, comedy enthusiast)

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This is the year we’ll remember for a Tiger becoming a Cheetah, pigs really did fly (swine flu, boom boom), America achieved what the world thought impossible and voted a black man in to the white house, Jackson, Swayze and Gately all went to the Roller Disco in the sky and Irish twins were more annoying than radioactive crabs.

But what actually happened to me through 2009? Anyone close to me may have felt like they were being drawn in to an Eastenders story line vortex, but thanks to family, old friends and a few new ones I’m finishing the year on a high. So while I’m feeling more positive than Mark Fowlers tests results here is my year by numbers, going 10 to 1 pop pickers…

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Originally written for the skinny online magazine

http://www.theskinny.co.uk/blog/9-the-dullest-blog/335-the-dullest-blog-comedy-ramblings-to-inpire-the-most-tedious-moment-of-your-week

Let me start by pointing out that I’m 31, single and have no kids, so when asked to write about “Family”, a broad grin spread across my face when I reminded myself that I don’t have one of my own.

Don’t get me wrong, there is a part of me that would love to settle down, have the house, the wife, the kids and the big dog (none of your yapping handbag accessory dogs, a proper dog that barks and eats postmen that rarely turn up).

But there are two main reasons I’m happy I don’t have the family unit (yet).

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http://www.theskinny.co.uk/blog/9-the-dullest-blog/308-the-dullest-blog-comedy-ramblings-to-inspire-the-dullest-moments-of-your-week

(The following was written for online listings magazine The Skinny, check out the link above)

No sooner had I read this month’s theme, it started. All my repressed memories of my school days started popping like giant acne in my brain.

Being skinnier than a super model with pig flu, my hair was cut by our neighbours “hairdresser” friend, my clothes were all hand-me-downs, combined with the NHS glasses I wore because my parents were too cheap to buy me cool specs, I looked like a puss faced, pubeless, mojo-free Austin Powers. I was the anti-Fonze.

I played drums in the school band, I did well in exams and was appalling at all sports. If there were a polar opposite point of being cool, I would have been standing right beside it with a goofy grin on my face.

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